


Thanks for Mutton

by write_light



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-18
Updated: 2010-12-18
Packaged: 2017-10-20 01:49:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/207504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/write_light/pseuds/write_light
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A bite, a curse, a full moon, Bobby's disregard for common decency, Dean protects Sam (again), and a Biblical sacrifice.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thanks for Mutton

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: Abuse of Dean; may cause vegetarianism  
> A/N: Written spur of the moment for spnwriterlounge's crack prompt, "mutton". Original commentfic here.

_Somewhere in the hills outside of Reno, Nevada..._

___

“Who are you supposed to be - Little Sam Peep?”

“Look, just shut up about the costume, okay? It’s an authentic Basque sheepherder’s outfit, and it’s the only way we won’t be noticed.

“I don’t intend to stay looking like this forever, you know.”

“No, Dean, I know, …” Sam’s voice became soft, almost pitying. “But you really do have a softer side, now.”

“Shut up.”

“And I could use a new sweater.”

“I will _bite you myself_ , Sam.”

***

“Were sheep found where?” Bobby repeated, growing increasingly confused.

“Reno. We found one outside Reno,” Sam yelled over the bleating. His one remaining bar flickered briefly.

“Can’t hear you, boy. Look, call me back, would you? I’ve got lamb chops on the stove right now, and Marcy from next door is in the parlor.”

. . .

“He hung up on me!” Sam said.

“Hot date, huh? What’s he cooking? One of his specialties?” Dean grinned.

“Lamb chops.”

“That sick fuck.”

***

“How do I tell the were-sheep from the real ones, Dean? Dean? Dean!”

Dean had vanished into the flock, his disguise better than good.

“Dean! Stay close!”

“Baaaaaaa.”

Sam noticed one sheep that was moving against the flock, its eyes glowing in the light of the newly risen full moon. It drew closer to him, watching intently.

“Dean? ... Is that you?”

It leapt at him, only to be cut down by a larger sheep that collided with it mid-way. As Sam reached for his silver-tipped crook, the two sheep tumbled down the slope in a ball of off-white wool and little black pipe-cleaner legs.

***

“I wish you’d all stop saying “sheep”. I was a _ram_. Pretty awesome set of horns too.” Dean smiled to himself.

“How did you get him free of the curse?” Bobby asked, still confused.

“I sacrificed the sheep that bit him originally,” Castiel said solemnly. “We have a lot of experience with sheep,” Cas added, expressionless. Sam snickered.

“Now you’re really a lamb of God,” he whispered to Dean.

___


End file.
